when everything goes wrong, things just won't go your way too. now my blog is attached with a password security. only people who are nice and friendly are allowed. owells.. my heart prickled again this morning when i woke up all of a sudden knowing i'm late. god's calling?FIRST bad happening. that prick was so painful that i've to endurewith it. but no matter what, first thing on my mind, omg! i've to wake up her. and yea.. she is up by then. took a cab down to school and i'm early for half an hour. during this past one week, my average slping time is like 2.3oam and waking up at 6.15am.SECOND bad happening.insufficient sleep adding to the flame in my heart. i've been giving her time to think about it and give her time for everything she is suppose to do. i tried very hard not to feel that way but that feeling is simply terrible! with no one to confide in when i'm really down and tired this few days. i felt so blissful and happy when she is in my life but all of a sudden,it just had to change. i tell myself not to cry and face it but who can i really approach and talk. WHO!? the problem is not my friends but me myself who rather choose to keep it to myself because i don't want them to get worried for me. i'm disappointed when you didn't tell me your problems but to your friends but i don't know what is bothering you too. i tried asking but i think i'm getting irritating and i finally got thefirst stern warning from you which shocked me and almost get meinto a car accident!THIRD BAD HAPPENING.i just felt so lost that time that i know my heart is crying and hurt. IT really hurts like something is stuck inside. upon yesterday night, i coincidentally went into chris friendster and when i find out that he got a gf , i was wondering how coud he do that to you!? many thoughts just went through my mind. what i said here is all i wanted to tell all my friends but i didn't say it out because i think is not right. i wanted to tell jol too but seeing her happy nowadays make me avoid her instead. all this are kept within me. can any kind souls tell me what to do? going to school and with that attitude, i'm no difference from a dead person. perhaps soon. i needa recover but ... i don't dare to sms her how i'm feeling now which will only makes her feel more irritated and hate me. i won't want that to happen.
but this is for you-i will keep praying for you for that decision u gonna made. i'm gonna be right there waiting like a fool or dumbdumb whenever you need someone to lean on. i will pray to him to make u get well soon. i wonder how you are feeling. i don't even know anything right now. failure! seriously people, i think i am a failure. i can't do anything to help her or make her smile when she is down. i'm gonna give u all the time. i will be waiting for the time when we first used to know each other. lastly, i'm sorry for all the things i made u fed up. i'm missing you badly and iloveu
